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‘Dish,’ ‘impactful’ and ‘fake news’ Among Words This University Thinks Should Be Banned

Let’s unpack this, which is likely to be one of the most impactful stories you read this year. Covfefe?

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Since 1974, Lake Superior State University has been publishing a list of words that it thinks should be banished from use during the upcoming year. 2018’s list, which is officially titled List of Words Banished From the Queen’s English for Misuse, Overuse and General Uselessness came out earlier this week and it includes some words that you probably use.

When was the last time you said “tons?” How about “Let me ask you this?” Or what about “fake news.” Well, we have to admit we used that one yesterday.

The banned words list has even inspired Wayne State University to start an annual list of words that should be used more often in the new year. How couth of them.

Here’s Lake Superior’s full list of words they want banned — and the reasons the word or phrase was included:

Unpack: Misused word for analyze, consider, assess. Concepts or positions are not packed, so they don’t need to be unpacked.

Tons: Refers to an exaggerated quantity, as in tons of sunshine or tons of work. “Lots” would surely suffice.

Dish: As in to dish out the latest rumor on someone. Let’s go back to “talks about” and leave dishes in the cupboard.

Pre-owned: What is so disgraceful about owning a used car now and then?

Onboarding/Offboarding: Creature from the HR Lagoon. We used to have hiring, training and orientation. Now we need to have an “onboarding” process. Firings, quitting and retirements are streamlined into “offboarding.”

Nothingburger: Says nothing that “nothing” doesn’t already. I’ll take a quarter pound of something in mine.

Let That Sink In: One could say shocking, profound or important. Let that sink in.

Let Me Ask You This: Wholly unnecessary statement. Just ask the question already.

Impactful: A frivolous word groping for something “effective” or “influential.”

Covfefe: An impulsive typo, born into a 140-character universe, somehow missed by the autocorrect feature.

Drill Down: Instead of expanding on a statement, we “drill down on it.”

Fake News: Once upon a time stories could be empirically disproved. Now “fake news” is any story you disagree with.

Hot Water Heater: Hot water does not need to be heated. “Water heater” or “hot water maker” will keep us out of hot water.

Gig Economy: Gigs are for musicians and stand-up comedians. Now expanded to imply a sense of freedom and a lifestyle that rejects tradition in a changing economic culture. Runs a risk of sharecropping.

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Campus Crime

Pennsylvania University Stunned by Child Pornography Allegations

Popular philosophy professor at Bloomsburg University charged with possessing child porn.

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Scott Lowe, a professor of philosophy at Bloomsburg University in Pennsylvania, was arrested late last week and charged with with four counts of possessing child pornography and one count of criminal use of a communication facility. The charges against the popular professor have left students and administration at the school of just over 9,000 students shocked.

The school’s newspaper, The Voice, reported:

Steve Hales, the head of the Philosophy department, expressed his disbelief for the situation, “It seemed like must be some kind of disturbing mistake which I couldn’t understand.” Hales was a friend to Lowe and, like many who knew him, could not understand what was happening. Lowe was known to be easy to get along with, reliable and was a very popular professor. Lowe enjoyed hanging out with his friends and playing pub trivia, according to Hales.

Bail for the 56-year-old Lowe was set at $250,000 and a preliminary hearing scheduled for February 28.

According to Lehigh Valley Live, a routine audit on the professor’s computer turned up “alarming malware associated with his internet usage of the Bloomsburg University network,” which led to a police investigation.

Several students told The Voice that they got no messages from the school about the situation and were surprised to find that classes were either cancelled or that other professors had stepped in to teach.

Miranda Jacobs told the paper that she had “heard a lot of stories about this guy about him being really nice and just very family oriented.”

 

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National News

Did the College Board Use Florida Shooting as Advertising Strategy?

A controversial mass email sent by the College Board on Wednesday has gone viral.

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A controversial mass email sent by the College Board on Wednesday has gone viral, eliciting a wave of public backlash against the organization’s alleged attempt to exploit last Wednesday’s Florida school shooting massacre to advertise the College Board’s Advanced Placement (AP) courses.

In his email to fellow colleagues and education administrators, College Board President David Coleman began his message by conveying College Board’s condolences to individuals and families affected by the tragedy. Coleman progressed to commend the efforts of student activist coalitions and draws upon Stoneman Douglas High School student Emma Gonzalez’s plea for gun control legislative reform.

He emphasized on how he felt “compelled to share the unadulterated, impassioned voice of a student,” whose exposure to AP Government has equipped her with necessary skills to identify evidence. However, Coleman expressed his conflicting perspective to Gonzalez’s position on gun control, asserting his belief that Gonzalez could have attempted “to better understand the positions of gun rights proponents.”

Coleman also references a published interview of another Stoneman Douglas student David Hogg, in which Hogg credits his AP History class for spurring his interest in the role of journalism in society, declaring that David Hogg’s words honor Advanced Placement teachers everywhere, for they reflect their power to open worlds and futures to students.”

Provoked by the contents of the email, several recipients have unleashed their ire on social media platforms. Andrew B. Palumbo, the Dean of Admissions and Financial Aid at Worcester Polytechnic Institute, tweeted his outrage in a reply to Jon Boesckenstedt, the Associate Vice President for Enrollment Management and Marketing at DePaul University, calling for College Board to immediately issue an apology to the public.

Former chairman of College Board’s science academic advisory committee, Jennifer Pfannerstill, tendered in her formal resignation on Thursday afternoon, citing that she is unable to “advocate for, and stand by, [an] organization that in one of our nation’s times of trial, would question the very students who allow them to exist and would promote itself as the only program to teach students how to use evidence”

The College Board has since broken its silence, publishing a public apology in an attempt to appease its angered social media followers and critics, exerting that they had no intention of diverting the attention away from the plights of the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School survivors and their community.

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National News

College Grants Scholarship Aid to Slain Police Officer’s Family

Eric Joering was fatally shot while on duty on February 10th.

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The children of slain Westerville Police officer have been awarded full-ride scholarships to attend Otterbein University.

The private four-year university first disclosed its decision to sponsor the daughters of Officer Eric Joering, who was fatally shot while on duty alongside Officer Anthony Morelli on February 10th, 2018, at a Westerville City Council meeting on Tuesday, February 20th. In a subsequent press release published on its website and social media accounts on Wednesday, the university expressed its hopes of providing a system of support for the Joering family as they transition through this difficult period by ensuring that each daughter “has sufficient support to complete an undergraduate degree at Otterbein.”

Otterbein University has also dedicated a Spotlight tribute in honor of the two officers, extending the university’s condolences to the families of the fallen officers as well as the Westerville Police Department.

Authorities have charged the 30-year-old perpetrator, Quentin Smith, with two counts of aggravated murder of Joering and Morelli. Officers Joering and Morelli were said to have arrived at Smith’s townhome residence after having received an urgent 911 domestic violence call where they were met with a hostile Smith. Former reports have indicated that there were several prior domestic violence incidences where police similarly had been called to Smith’s property, albeit without any arrests made.

Smith was reported to have been critically injured upon his arrest and was promptly hospitalized. Smith has since been discharged and is currently held without bail.

 

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